You hate me don’t you? I post this incredible, awe-inspiring piece about Halloween-Birthday Weekend (which I realize now I should have been calling Birthday Halloweekend…stupid, stupid, stupid) and I write that I don’t want to ruin the surprise but I have a HUGE goal for my 25th year and…wait, wait for it, sorry I’ll tell you on November 1st since that’s when my 25th goes down.
And now it’s November 7 and you’re sitting there, pressing the refresh button over and over again wondering, “Has she really forgotten about us?”
Or maybe, “Is she dead?”
Well I’m happy to inform you, dear readers, that not only did I not forget about you but that I’m also not dead!
No. Sadly, the real reason you haven’t heard from me in 7 days is because your Janine Julia was playing a game of avoidance.
See if I posted on here what my big goal was, then I would have to face it – you know, like actually do something about it? And who the hell actually wants to realize their dreams? That’s hard work, people!
So I decided to hit snooze for 7 days.
But I’m back. And I am here to face reality. And my first step in that direction is to finally come clean.
In my post about 25 year old Janine I first mentioned that I had several goals to accomplish. I toyed with the idea of creating a list of 25 goals for my 25th year. I went through my brain thinking of all the cool things I wanted to see, all the places I wanted to go, all the ways I wanted to improve my mind, body and spirituality.
I want to see the Northern Lights. I want to ride an elephant. I want to get married (to someone in particular) and have little Janine Julias. I want to go back to school. I want to read all the books on my to-read list. I want to run a mile without throwing up afterwards.
Seriously, don't die
As I perused the possibilities of my life in the next year I kept coming down to one great thing that I’ve always wanted. One thing that I’ve talked about and written about for years. The one thing that would require the discipline of a public proclamation (and therefore public humiliation if I fail) in order to get there.
There is truly only one thing I have ever wanted that I know I was put on this Earth to do- and that thing is to write.
So this is the year. This is the year I grab life by the 25th year-old horns and say, “Let’s do this!”
Because over the past few years I’ve realized that talent is a very small part of the process of becoming a published, noted author. The largest part of realizing this goal is self-determination, relentless hard work and the tenacity of a fool.
And spell checker. Thank God for spell checker.
Luckily, for me, I am that tenacious fool with spell checker.
So can you blame me for taking 7 more days of pretending I wasn’t going to do this before signing my social life’s death sentence?